Friday, April 13, 2012

Zach's Pro Tips: Don't Sleep on the Love Seat

We've all been there. You get home after a long day, sit down on the love seat, maybe turn on the TV. Before you know it you feel yourself getting a little drowsy. You might feel the urge to lay down for a cat nap. 

Here's a pro tip from Zach: Don't do it!

I've conducted extensive research and documented my findings in the hopes of saving you from possible disaster. 

This is the classic pose that you think will work, but doesn't.  First of all, you forgot to turn off the light. This position offers no protection from 19 watt florescent bulbs.  You are going to wake up with a crink in your neck and a love seat isn't designed to support your lower back. 

The diagonal extended approach offers protection from the light, but it is probable that you will fall off after one miscalculated move. 

Whale in a Fishbowl: This one sounds good- as you have more room to stretch out, but only compounds the neck pain upon awakening. 

The Avalanche: Sometimes fatigue get the best of us and we think something like this is a good idea. It's not. 

The Armrest Body Pillow: Doesn't offer as much support as it promises. 

The Rump-elstiltskin: Oxygen comes at a premium in this position.

The Jolly Green Giant: When the blessing of long legs becomes a curse.

The Hotdog: This one offers a fair bit of support to start, but is likely to suffer the dreaded "fall in the crack" curse as your restless movements push the cushions around.

The Plank: A great ab workout. Not so practical for sleeping.

I hope this research helps you make a proper decision.

Remember: Walk the 20 feet to your deluxe, King-sized, 4 inch memory foam bed, with full body pillow and down comforter.

You'll thank me in the morning.

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